


Some Kind of Messed Up Romance

by goldkirk



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-11-12
Updated: 2014-12-30
Packaged: 2018-02-25 04:08:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,087
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2607938
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/goldkirk/pseuds/goldkirk
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Five sort-of-interconnected LeviHan oneshots inspired by My Chemical Romance's song "The Sharpest Lives." Modern AU, a little dark but there's a happy ending.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Sofa

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hange pokes Levi in the face, and he wrinkles his nose. "Levi. If you're going to come crash on my couch, at least bring your own clothes."

_Well it rains and it pours when you're out on your own, if I crash on the couch can I sleep in my clothes? -The Sharpest Lives, My Chemical Romance_

* * *

 

Levi tumbled in through the window he'd just lockpicked open, standing up quickly to shut it and keep more water from getting into Hange's apartment than what he was already tracking in. He was filthy and sopping wet and now he was dripping all over her never-ending stacks of paper, which she probably wouldn't even notice but he didn't want anything to get ruined. Levi squelched his way to the bathroom as quickly as he could, leaving a trail of water and random tree leaves in his wake.

Half an hour later, the floor was pristine, his clothes were in the dryer, and Levi himself was crashed on the sofa wearing some old tracksuit of Hange's. 

* * *

 

Hange comes in two hours later at 3 A.M., still in her lab clothes and looking like roadkill. She flicks the light on and suddenly catches sight of Levi curled up on her cruddy old couch. (The life of a grad student researcher doesn't afford many luxuries.) She dumps her satchel by the door and walks over to him with a slight smile.

Hange pokes Levi in the face, and he wrinkles his nose. "Levi. If you're going to come crash on my couch, at least bring your own clothes."

"I did," Levi muttered, rolling over. "They were wet." 

"Hey, did you clean my floor?"

"All of it." Levi's voice was muffled by the cushions.

"Thanks. I've been meaning to do that for ages, but—well, you know me."

"It was the least I could do after getting rain everywhere. Do you mind me staying here for the night? My roommates decided to have one of their "parties" and I don't want to be mistaken for an eggplant again."

Hange chuckled. "Yeah, we wouldn't want that."

"Hange..." Levi groaned, trying to bury his face in the couch.

"Sorry. Of course you can stay. Just give me back my clothes in the morning."

"Thanks..." Thirty seconds later, he was completely out of it. Hange scrounged up an old quilt and carefully pulled it over the small man, trying not to disturb his sleep, and then headed to her room to go to bed herself. In the doorway, she paused and looked back.

"You can always stay here, Levi. I know you don't have anywhere else to go. I just wish you weren't so stubborn and you'd be honest with me about it. I'd much rather you stay here with me every night than sleep on the streets most of the time just to keep up appearances. One of these times you're going to get sick or something and then—well. Just...you're not alone, Levi. You don't have to fly solo anymore. You've got me. I just wish you'd realize that."

The night silently devoured the words and secrets that neither of them were brave enough to share in the consciousness of daylight.

 


	2. Get Me Out

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The only reason Levi was stepping foot in the nightclub tonight was because he had a mission: get in, grab her, get out, go home. She never said please. She never needed to. So for Hange to send him a desperate text like that, actually asking for help and even saying please...Levi knew Hange really needed him. And he wasn't going to abandon her. 
> 
> Levi was out the door and halfway there in four minutes.

_'Cause I've spent the night dancing, I'm drunk I suppose/ If it looks like I'm laughing, I'm really just asking to leave. -The Sharpest Lives, My Chemical Romance_

* * *

 

Levi flashes his ID at the suspicious bouncer as he storms into the nightclub regardless of the bouncer's opinion. Several years of experience with being rather short and retaining his young looks had made him all too aware of the fact that no one ever believed he was as old as he was. But no matter what the bouncer thought, he wasn't there to party. He didn't even like nightclubs; they weren't his thing. He prefered the solitude of his apartment and some alternative or classical music to the flashy lights, drunk dancing, and overwhelmingly irritating pop dance music that the clubs were full of. The only reason Levi was stepping foot in the nightclub tonight was because he had a mission: get in, grab her, get out, go home.

He'd gotten a desperate text from Hange that was clearly being typed hastily, in secret, without looking at the screen. Once he deciphered the actual message behind all the garbled spellings and strange typos, it read something along the lines of  _Levi please I need you to come get me out of here because there are a lot of creepy undergrads and they won't stop hitting on me and I MIGHT have told them that I had a short and angry boyfriend who got jealous easily (I know you're not my boyfriend but it was the first thing I thought of okay) and it's helping a bit but that's not going to last long and I want to get out but no one will help me Levi please—_ and he had put on his coat with a sigh, because there was no way he could abandon her to that. And most importantly, Hange had said please.

She never said please. She never needed to.

Levi was out the door and halfway there in four minutes. Hange was one of the most self-sufficient people he had ever met. She could, and did, take care of herself. Hange didn't ask for help, which drove Levi crazy because he couldn't even count the number of times he'd had to bail her out from a lab experiment gone wrong or take care of her when she passed out from being sick and hadn't let anyone know or did her hair for her when she was going to an awards banquet and didn't even remember how to braid her hair, much less curl it, and hadn't thought to tell anyone that until she had twenty minutes to get there. That had been crazy. 

So for Hange to send him a desperate text like that, actually asking for help and even saying please...Levi knew Hange really needed him. And he wasn't going to abandon her. Funny thing was, Hange didn't really go out clubbing either. She was a workaholic and spent most of her time in the lab doing research for her grad school projects, and what little time she wasn't there she was usually with Levi just sleeping and watching old movies and eating his good cooking (because Levi actually had a life and a job and was a functioning adult—after graduating college he'd opted not to get a masters and opened up a decently-successful martial arts and ballroom dance studio). Levi wondered why on earth she was stuck at a club all alone.

The small man sliced his way through the busy club, dark aura trailing behind him like a storm cloud, until he spotted her backed into a corner. She wasn't actively in trouble, but she couldn't really get out either. Levi could see her problem. She was hemmed into the corner by a bunch of idiot undergrads who had had too much to drink and didn't have common sense anymore. He could see her pretending to laugh and firing off non-stop banter at them, keeping them engaged and distracted to buy time, and Levi was suddenly quite angry over the fact that Hange—HIS Hange, strong and independent and brilliant—was having to do that just to keep the imbeciles away. 

"Hey!" Levi growled, barrelling his way through the younger students. Hange's eyes snapped up to his, and he saw a flame of relief and hope explode somewhere deep in her constantly-speeding brain. Levi reached out to take her hand as he turned back to the startled undergrads. "What do you think you're doing?" The younger men were edging away, unnerved by the seething anger and threatening glare they were getting from Levi.

Two minutes later, they were all dispersed to various parts of the club nursing bruised egos and making resolutions to choose a less risky girl to hit on next time, and Levi was holding his passenger door open for Hange. He shut it behind her once she was settled in the seat, and then got in on his side and started the car. As he pulled away from the curb, he glanced at Hange and saw she had leaned her head back on the headrest and had tears slipping out from under her tightly-closed eyelids. 

They drove in silence for a few blocks until he saw she'd collected herself, and then he spoke up. "Hange, what were you doing there?" She didn't respond for a moment, then sighed.

"You know the two new interns at the lab?"

"The ones with terrible music taste who like making mean jokes about you that I wish you'd just punch already and get it over with? Yeah, I know the ones."

"They asked me to go out to dinner with them, and I said yes because I know I should get out more. But they didn't take me to a restaurant, they drove through and got burgers and then ended up here."

"Why did you go in?" Levi asked.

"I didn't want to look like a jerk. They told me I'd have fun, just loosen up for an evening...yeah right. They ditched me about ten minutes in to go to a buddy's house and told me to have a great night."

"And that's when the creeps started coming up on you and you couldn't escape."

"Yeah," Hange said, then went back to staring out the window. Levi made a mental note to  _talk_ with Hange's lab interns at the soonest opportunity. He drove on in silence, automatically taking the route to Hange's apartment. It was as familiar to him as his own way home by this point.

"Sorry," Hange whipsered. Levi threw her a sharp look.

"You don't have anything to apologize for."

"I dragged you into my mess. I was stupid tonight. I should have known better."

Levi pulled into one of the parking spaces in front of her building and turned the car off before pulling Hange around to face him. "Listen, you could have done better earlier, sure. But you did the best you could with a bad situation once you got stuck, and I don't want you to ever feel bad for asking me for help. I'll always come help you. There was no way I would leave you stuck like that. Who knows what would have happened? We all mess up sometimes, Hange. That's why we have friends who love us for better or worse—they pick us back up when we fall." Hange looked at him, her face a mix of gratitude, embarrassment, relief, and happiness. "Now get out of here and go to bed. I bet you haven't slept in two days, and after this you'll need it."

"Levi..." Hange opened her door and slid out. "Thank you."

"Don't hesitate to call me. I'm your friend. It's part of my job description that I'm supposed to help."

"I won't." She closed the door and started up the front walk.

She was about to walk in the door when Levi jumped halfway out of his car and called after her. "Hey Hange!" 

She turned.

"I wouldn't mind it. Being your jealous boyfriend." Levi bit out. He wasn't good with expressing his feelings like this.

A slow, bright smile spread across Hange's face. "I wouldn't mind it either." Then she turned and shut the door behind her, leaving Levi to blink a few times before getting back in his car and driving home. Neither of them had ever been particularly normal. Of course them finally admitting they liked each other wouldn't be either. There would be plenty of time for them to talk and sort through their relationship soup in the morning— _after_ they'd both gotten some decent sleep.

* * *

 

Yeah, Levi didn't think he'd mind it at all.


	3. Coffee

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He hated her so much sometimes, hated Hange and her crazy self. She constantly drove him mad, but somehow he found himself falling for her anyway. His life was just weird like that, he supposed.

_You're the one that I need, I'm the one that you loathe. -The Sharpest Lives, My Chemical Romance_

* * *

 

He met her on one of those days where everything keeps going wrong, from the water in the bathroom sink in the morning to the weather outside to the chair you walk into right before bed that's just the rotted-cherry topping on a melted sundae—that kind of a day. Their first meeting fell in the middle of a gloomy and slow day at the café.

Levi still remembered the first moment he saw her. She was stumbling into the café with her nose half-hidden behind a thick book, her hair a royal unwashed mess, clothes rumpled, with a half-unzipped backpack slung over one shoulder. Her glasses were held together with tape, and she wore a tattered lab coat that might have been white at one point. She wandered slowly up to the counter, still buried in her book. After waiting several moments, Levi decided to interrupt the oblivious individual.

“Can I help you?” he sighed.

She looked up, seeming startled. Large brown eyes blinked at Levi through incredibly smudged lenses, and he found his fingers twitching with the massive urge to rip them off her face and clean them properly. Maybe the rest of her too. She finally pulled her face out of the book and revealed the rest of her nose, which was fairly large.

“What?” she said.

“I said, can I help you?”

“Oh!” she said, grinning. “Right. Can I get grande coffee?”

“No, you can't,” said Levi, deadpan.

“…um…” She looked thrown off.

“We only serve tea. It’s a new policy. Coffee has been deemed useless dirt and replaced with new flavors of tea from around the world.”

“Levi…” a tired voice chimed in from over by the drive-through window.

“Oh bug off, Erwin,” Levi grumbled. He turned back to Hange. “Yes, of course you can get a coffee. This is a coffee shop. Although tea is a much better option for numerous reasons—“

_ “Levi.” _

“—and honestly you look more like you should go crash on a bed for four days than have a coffee.”

“LEVI.”

“ALL RIGHT, ERWIN.”

“Well,” she said, shoving her glasses up higher on her nose, “I have too much to do. Sleep can come later. I have a report I have to finish on my recent experiments. So if I could just get a coffee, grande, skim milk, black, sometime this half of the century, that would be awesome.” 

“One grande coffee, coming right up,” Levi muttered.

She fished around for change in her lab coat pockets, and Levi cringed as he took the money from her. Who knew what that money was contaminated with. As she shifted her backpack and turned to head over to a table, he called after her.

“Name?”

“Oh!” She turned to look over her shoulder. “Hange.”

“Hange?” Levi asked, frowning. “Is that a first name?”

“Nope,” Hange said. “Surname.”

“What’s your first name, then?”

“That’s for me to know, and you to find out if you ever want to talk sometime!” Hange threw him a grin as she bounced over to a table.

Levi shook his head and went to make her drink. It had been a long time before anyone interesting had stumbled into his life. Maybe he _would_ talk to her. It wasn’t like they were busy, and what could it hurt?

A few minutes later, Levi set her coffee and himself down at her table, and she looked up.

"Well hello there, Mr. Grumpy!" she chirped.

"My name is Levi."

She grinned. "Hello, Levi."

"Hi. Now what's your name?"

"Hange."

"Your full name."

"Mmmm, nope, not yet!" Hange chided him. "You have to work for it."  


"That's not very fair," Levi protested. "You know my name but I don't know yours."

"Then you shouldn't go around throwing your name out so willingly to strangers. Tell you what, you talk with me for a while and if we end up being friends, I'll tell you my real name on one of our other meetings."

Other meetings? Dear heavens, what had Levi gotten himself into this time? Did he really want this crazy woman as a friend?

He supposed it couldn't be worse than currently having only one friend, and that friend being Erwin. It was worth a shot.

"Fine. Why not."

"Awesome!" Hange clapped her hands together. "So, do you know anything about molecular engineering?"

* * *

 

He was studying IT at Sina Tech. She was a molecular engineering major at Rose Arbor University—one of the first students in the field there.

Levi loved English, classical music, flavored tea, and The Glitch Mob. Hange loved math, bubbly alternative music, coffee the strength of rocket fuel, and The Doors.

Levi was a clean freak. Hange was a constant mess.

Levi, coming from a background in poverty, homelessness, and lots of filth, couldn’t wrap his head around her complete disregard for personal hygiene and basic cleanliness and organization.

He hated her so much sometimes, hated Hange and her crazy self. She constantly drove him mad, but somehow he found himself falling for her anyway. His life was just weird like that, he supposed. 

* * *

One day, when both were finished with their classes for the day and had met at Hange’s apartment to watch some movie from the BBC about dolphins that Hange swore Levi would love, he dropped onto the couch next to her and said, “I really hate you, you know.”

“Mmmm, I love you too! Thank you for cleaning again, Levi.”

“It’s not like I have a choice. If I don’t do it, you certainly won’t, and I won’t have you living in filth. It’s unsanitary.”

“Look at you, caring about my health! It’s so sweet.”

“Shut up.”

“Levi loooovvvvvesss me!” She ducked with a squeak as Levi swung a pillow at her face.

“So what if I do, shitty glasses? What about you?”

“Then I’d say I love you too, and I have since you first acted like a total grouchy tea elitist.”

“But I did put up with your two-hour-long lecture about atoms or molecules or whatever the heck it was. No one else would do that.”

“True,” Hange mumbled as she curled up into Levi’s side. The movie started and they watched in silence for a few minutes, Levi absentmindedly running a hand through her clean (he’d insisted) hair, before Hange said quietly, “Levi?”

“Hm,” he said, not looking.

“My name is Zoe.”

Levi paused the movie and turned to look at her. They locked eyes, and Hange was amazed to see Levi give her one of his rare smiles.

“Hello Zoe,” he said, wrapping his arms around her. “I’m Levi. And I’m going to kiss you now.”

He did. 


End file.
